What is Goodness?

This past spring when I told a friend about Winks of Goodness, she immediately said that I would have to explain what goodness is or at least what I think it is. Though that’s an obvious question to cover in a blog about goodness, the idea of writing about what goodness actually is had never occurred to me. (This is one of the zillion reasons you need friends who tell you what they really think. These are the same people who will tell you that even though you’re in good shape, you are indeed too old to wear a micro mini-skirt. Keep these people in your life.) 

            I don’t expect to answer what goodness is in one blog post, so don’t prepare to walk away from reading this completely enlightened. And I’m not going to take the easy route of typing the definition of goodness that’s found in the dictionary because a) that’s incredibly lame and b) we’re here to go below the surface and dig out the good stuff. Instead, I’m going to explain my baseline idea of goodness. 

            Goodness is something you recognize immediately when it’s present and notice instantly when it’s not. For me, goodness is a basic way of treating people. It’s a mixture of respect and kindness that provides comfort and love in all sorts of situations. It works for tragedies, victories, uncomfortable encounters, family get-togethers and daily living. 

            It’s talking and, more importantly, listening to someone when they’re hurting. Just being there is goodness because so many people flee from sadness or anything remotely real these days. (I call these people “Greatest Hits Folks” and you can bet a blog entry will be written about them sooner than later. Don’t be one of these people. Life is about the good and the bad. You can’t fully have one without the other.) 

            Goodness is putting others before yourself even when it’s hard, but it’s also taking care of yourself so you can do the hard stuff for others. It’s giving someone a hug before they realize how much they need one. It’s texting a funny thought. It’s being honest at all costs — with the exception of birthday presents, Christmas gifts and surprise parties. You can lie your ass off about those things in my book. 

            Goodness is doing the right thing because that’s what you do. You don’t do it for rewards, recognition or payment. You do it because that’s the way it’s done. It’s returning a found wallet, helping an elderly person down the stairs, telling the waiter you’ve been undercharged for your meal, giving a compliment, saying “hi” to someone who is different from you, keeping your word and so on. 

            If you live your life with these guiding principles, you will live a life of goodness, and that’ll inspire others to do the same. It’s like eating dinner with a friend. If they order first and opt for a salad, you’re most likely going to go the healthy route, too. (You might stop and get something on the way home, but none of us is perfect). 

            The reality is that goodness is always there. It’s in a cool breeze on a hot day. It’s in a dandelion fighting its way through a sidewalk. It’s in a friend listening to a friend’s worries. It’s in a duck leading her ducklings across a busy street. It’s everywhere, and it’s up to us to tap into it. When I let it stream into my life, I experience a fullness that transcends everything and everyone around me. Try letting goodness in and see what it does for you.